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  • Writer's pictureMichelle Nicholson

Cultivating Kindness Through My Coaching Journey

She remembered who she was, and the game changed. - Lalah Delia 

As I reach the final stretch of my journey toward completing my life coach certification with Co-Active, I recollect how I have continually transformed. Life coaches are human, too. As an architect of powerful intent and purpose, I help individuals, professionals, and organizations cultivate fulfilling lives by defining empowering boundaries, evolving their mindsets, and inspiring positive change. 

Defining The Path

There is room for self-improvement in every area of our lives. But lasting transformation begins from within. I'm reminded of the power of self-love and care in enabling us to cultivate and spread more kindness outwardly. It starts by defining your core values and honoring your self-worth. We must acknowledge our limits, find healthy ways to communicate them kindly but firmly, and, most importantly, uphold them consistently. This builds self-trust and self-love.

Whether coaching an individual or an organizational team, it is essential to note that life coaching for me directly ties into the AllProfit HR mission to build a sustainable and stellar culture of belonging for all. How can we achieve belonging in our communities and organizational workspaces if we limit the opportunities to live authentically within our own being daily? - Michelle

Aligning my two decades of experience in human resources with the praxis of Co-Active allows me to center my coaching practice on asking clients powerful questions to expand self-awareness that defines, evolves, and inspires impact. My coaching aims to define the joys and desires that allow you to evolve daily and inspire your highest self.

We are kind to ourselves when we focus inward. We gain clarity on our needs and expand our capacity to better care for ourselves. This self-care allows us to better show up in our family, relationships, workspaces, and the world more fulfilled. Whether coaching an individual or an organizational team, it is essential to note that life coaching for me directly ties into the AllProfit HR mission to build a sustainable and stellar culture of belonging for all. How can we achieve belonging in our communities and organizational workspaces if we limit the opportunities to live authentically within our own being daily? 

Creating Space for Evolution

The coaching process has inspired me to transform my own life. I was overworked, overwhelmed by stress, and neglecting my health and passions. Now, I proudly embody work-life integration, not just balance. I uplift others most by first filling my cup. I've discovered that success means little without inner well-being, if for no other reason than one can not truly enjoy it. 

But this insight was hard-won. I had to reach my breaking point before making a change. In 2023, amidst significant professional and personal challenges, I started the New Year depleted, overwhelmed, and severely lacking in self-care. The weight of organizational issues and the struggle against systemic injustices took a toll on my well-being. I was focused outwardly. I felt trapped in roles and responsibilities, putting others’ needs before my own to the detriment of my health, and I had relinquished my inner compass. 

It was evident that I lacked boundaries. Fortunately for me, I had a phenomenal earth angel during this period. Janeen Latini, an executive coach introduced to me through prior work experience, was extremely instrumental in guiding my professional re-centering. Through coaching sessions with Janeen, I was challenged to redefine my priorities and set boundaries that honored my needs, even when they felt uncomfortable or foreign. 

Through my personal coaching experience with Janeen, I regained direction. I was guided to identify missing pieces and incorporate self-care into my routine. One pivotal question she asked me was, "What does love look like today for Michelle?" This simple yet profound inquiry became a daily reminder to prioritize self-love and care. It led me to rediscover my joys of prayer, meditation, exercise, and healthy lifestyle choices.

It is not a euphemism when people say you must place your oxygen mask on first before assisting others. You indeed have to make sure that you are cared for first and that you are breathing successfully before assisting others. This applies to the holistic journey of life. Each day, I have to nourish myself with self-care for other people to survive and for me to move on and thrive. 

I began to say “no” to energy-draining commitments. — Michelle 

I began to say “no” to energy-draining commitments. I guarded sacred space for nourishment – worship, exercise, laughter, and rest. I discovered the difference between overriding exhaustion to push ahead and setting healthy limitations so I could sustainably serve others. As my coach, Janeen, held me accountable, I set firmer boundaries around my time and attention. 

This required transparency about what I was ready to handle. It meant stepping back to discern what projects and relationships were misaligned with my values before over-committing. My transformative journey of self-love taught me that, as humans, we can only spread kindness from a place of abundance, not depletion. In giving to ourselves, we gain the capacity to give to others. By embracing love for myself, I found the strength to navigate life's journey with grace, resilience, and appreciation.

Living An Inspirational Life

The coaching process, my experience with Janeen, and my Co-Active journey dissolved my tendency toward perfectionism, people-pleasing, or validation by repeatedly asking: “What does love look like today for Michelle?” This reframed view of self-care is not selfishness but self-full, as I return to my authentic center, or compass - my values. Being intentionally self-full allows me to tune my instrument so I vibrate at full frequency.

I am about to be somebody's whole wife. Michelle

Love manifested through renewing my dedication to God, surrounding myself with a supportive community, speaking affirmations over my mind and body, and welcoming rest. Gradually, the high blood pressure signaling my angst subsided. My mood lifted; creativity flowed; I glowed with restored vitality and was seen and loved more fully by the world. 

Self-love attracts more love. 

I had been running on empty for so long that I lost sight of the miracles unfolding daily through God's grace alone. While overwhelmed, my vision was blurred by the swirling chaos I had accepted as usual. Still, God laid the foundation for joyful transformations yet to come.

As I began prioritizing self-care and establishing much-needed boundaries, unexpected blessings blossomed. I intentionally focused on creating space amidst the clutter of stress to continually make room for myself to breathe, refocus, and find my center. And in that spaciousness, love took root and flourished. Into my life walked my beloved. Do you hear me? I am about to be somebody's whole wife. Once I acknowledged myself, I attracted a kindred spirit who continually embraces every part of me, boundaries and all. Each day, I joyously look forward to fully pursuing and welcoming all the wonders that exist with my future spouse as opportunities that I desire.

I no longer view self-preservation as optional pampering; I now see it as essential to upholding my calling and living in my abundant purpose. I embrace loving myself as integral to authentic living. By boldly affirming my worth and needs, I exude daily the courage to live out my divine purpose in all aspects of my life.

Caring for myself is not self-indulgence; it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare. — Audre Lorde 

Thriving Authentically

Are you ready to fall in love with your whole life?

Practicing regular self-care attunes us to the unique needs of our body, mind, and spirit. From this inner awareness, we're more aware of opportunities for kindness all around us. Consider nurturing yourself through integrated life coaching to exude more care and compassion toward others. Still on the fence about coaching? Check out my previous article entitled The Six ACTIVE Benefits of Coaching

Together, let's embark on this transformative journey guided by the power of integrated life coaching. Schedule your complimentary discovery call today to start your journey toward a more fulfilling life with coaching.

Share Your Thoughts

Join the conversation on the transformative power of self-kindness. Let's reimagine people-centered workplaces where everyone profits - personally and professionally.

What is a way that you would like to express more kindness to yourself this year?

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